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| Alien Invasion • Lasers Aim for Rebel Strongholds |
Below, It's September 2014 RhymeCrime!
There are a few photos below, which I took including the one shown here.
There are other promos and terribly witty tweets throughout as well; some are just terrible, but I've tried my damnedest to avoid the worst of the bratwurst. Of course, when it comes to puns, I loose them on you without mercy.
The theory of RhymeCrime! is to bring about the end of the whirled as we know it, or at least the tilt in the world. These axis points have long been a thorn in our two sides. It's a bipolar concept I've tried to explain to others before, but few have taken me sarcastically enough to follow along. All I've ever wanted was followers, and I was into social screedia long before Twitter took the reins, and poured cold water all over my tirades.
At 150 characters, my idea was superior! My characters were larger than life, the Robin Williams' of a Big Bird type, and type even more, 10 WHOLE characters MORE! It's a sad day when volume did not stand for more than quality. It's like our manufacturing, 10,000,000 K-Cars or 100,000 Teslas… What are we thinking!? A billion PCs or a few million Apples, what was Steve Jobs thinking!?!? The flaky hippie bastard! Let's get back to an America when we were tops, and everyone else didn't have a chance in helvetica!
As a font of wisdom, my idea, typed here, is to return to when we as Americans were even more pompous and full of ourselves than anyone can imagine. What I wouldn't give for some Betty Friedan thighs, Hoover/McCarthy Commies-are-everywhere Suckers, and Capitalists have no masters, but can be big Johnsons. We can grow our way out of this socialist slump by burying ourselves in enough stuff to snuff out the future of our particulate deformed and ready to be drowned children.
Thank you! I'm here all week, or until I'm deported, raptured or 2nd coming of Detroit, and the lions…
Sincerely,
RTC
NOTE: Pic above/on right also on RTC 5 Communities Instagram.
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Hey I’ve got another outlet for my twitticisms with pictorial tendencies... http://t.co/tNQJFljfK2
By RTC
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 1, 2014
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It's an invasion
Rise for occasion
But solve the equation
With speech as persuasion
#Beers shared abate abrasion
#Wine drank reduces evasion
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) October 1, 2014
Follow me on instagram, then on me, download their free #instagram app. http://t.co/tNQJFljfK2 Free should be FREE for ALL!… oh, it is? huh.
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 30, 2014
The end time
For my kind of rhyme
As a few laugh in mime
I chagrin, baring my crime
A peanut gal's heckles chime
So I ask, #spare me sublime
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 30, 2014
Just throwing darts
Look @ them tarts
That really smarts
Eyes off them parts
Have #beer say when game starts
Ladies…my #wine tops the charts
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 30, 2014
Riding on a jet plane
Dreams of #TaylorDayne
Downed by a fossil fueled vein
Screaming from a Mitt made bane
World gone inane
Stop this reign
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 29, 2014
RT^@BrianKlymDDS Good evening! Get comfortably prepared for your visit. pic.twitter.com/Qwt10utgeu Meet our team http://t.co/7Y7k2yvAMm #dentist
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 15, 2014
Went to pick up chicks
Gals only saw hicks
No…we're just dicks
Bro bouncer our ass kicks
Now #beer warm from Styx
& #wine from stove top mix
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 29, 2014
Forever on a brink
It all seems to stink
Was told I can't date Pink
Her husband's the fink
Very few click my link
My #iPhone won't even sync
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 28, 2014
This rhyme may jar
After coming by car
We 3 walk in a bar
Many #beers rock our star
Much #wine raps us subpar
Keep our keys so lives not mar
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 28, 2014
Time to play
I danced in ballet
Flitted as birds of prey
No hawk ever did I say
Rolled like a #whale gray
Obviously not quit eating that hay
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 27, 2014
Why anger mace
You shut your face
That spray does debase
You just can't keep pace
#Beers will see us embrace
You #wine stained cold case
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 27, 2014
Stop party griping
End all stereotyping
Quit dogged sniping
Cease credit data swiping…
But keep #Benghazi hyping
Then finish my brain wiping
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 26, 2014
See the many months of RhymeCrime, over 600 of them and other fun, to supposed to be funny, stuff: http://t.co/sX6aHDgu1H
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 26, 2014
Alarm fire of 99
#Beers on the wall a sign
My luck does out shine
Placing a bet on the vine
Grow grapes to make #wine
No the debt's all mine
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 26, 2014
Get to the following http://t.co/tNQJFljfK2 it's not like we have much else to do… ;-)
RTC on #instagram
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 26, 2014
Between rock & #Iraq
Forgot to wood knock
Rants of the war sniffer flock
Add awful boils in schlock
Nation built by caulk
Love not more hawk
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 25, 2014
Must tie on plow
Bring wife of wow
Then fill up with chow
Cash out all left in Dow
Haul off #beer in a scow
Buy #wine barreled big as allow
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 25, 2014
I'm thinking about when the twain do not meet, then "we" miss the boat in some way…as in science & personal belief in a "thing" (not being).
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 24, 2014
Send US your refuse
Take back now #excuse
What has been let loose
The #fear mongering ruse
By the lone percent muse
Prey of the agog of zeus
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 24, 2014
Visited vineyards
One split in thirds
Figured was for birds
#Wine, popcorn+whiz curds?
No, #beer+good food in other words
They came in herds
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 24, 2014
Nation stuck in eddy
Not #climate repent ready
#Congress runs unsteady
Do progressive like Teddy
Survival odds thready
Rallies getting heady
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 23, 2014
Over 600 #RhymeCrime! now available on my new appendix…via a recent appendicitis surgery. Actually, just use my blog: http://t.co/sX6aHDgu1H
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 23, 2014
Got to Bob's Place
Said need same & chase
His reply…better brace
Spread fast a pale face
Then he got in my space
Craft #beer & #wine embrace
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 23, 2014
Yell out a rebel cry
Fear voiced too sly
The threat very dry:
Cold dead hands pry…
Yet #guns you can still buy
A strong armed lobby few deny
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 22, 2014
See a varied hue
Vary your bland view
Think of a better brew
The #beer they'll debut
Bottle up some #wine in lieu
Add some cheese I'm fondue
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 22, 2014
Save the last dance
I'm in a deep trance
Yah, I have no chance
Just jab me with a lance
Yes it was a stupid stance
So I now give up #romance
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 21, 2014
Find common ground
Check ideology astound
Now positive propound
Let all opinions abound
#Beer helps untold expound
And #wine many have found
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 21, 2014
Wealthy upper crust
Overtaxed is cussed
Create jobs we entrust
That seems a #bust
Seekers pound paved to dust
Then #jobless into vice thrust
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 20, 2014
Singing a ditty
I ride to the city
Dreaming I'm witty
Yet ladies only pity
From the #beer & #wine committee
Man… You're like a Walter Shitty
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 20, 2014
Got a little glitch in my #instagram hitch, giddyup, & post up. My iPhone got itself lost in the woods. Still follow. http://t.co/tNQJFljfK2
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 19, 2014
Broke thru ceiling
Sent them reeling
Brawny less appealing
#War its worst dealing
Brain up! Stop life stealing
So sad hurt the man's feeling
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 19, 2014
Fancy me here
A boy of good cheer
Thinking fairly clear
Rambling to the frontier
Obviously…I'll need #beer
To cover tracks…#wine for my dear
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 19, 2014
It's me, RTC on the #instagram. Follow me now, or I'll get lost all by myself… http://t.co/tNQJFljfK2
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 18, 2014
I'm alive & well…
Under a shaky shell
A snap turns to yell
Only can stand a spell
Some may call a #debt knell
Owe piper for each time I fell
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 18, 2014
Send in clowns
Hosting many pounds
Wearing inhospitable gowns
Drinking doctored grounds
Their #beer bellies go rounds
As much #wine resounds
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 18, 2014
Let's cut to the chaste…Let me rephrase. Let's open a case…#Beer & #Wine #RhymeCrime slashes @ 10pm. Here's 300+ done…http://t.co/eqBGVmGyl6
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 17, 2014
Follow now, & the next 30 days is free. This free trial & tribulation offering lasts until I get my reaper's quota… http://t.co/mySmtqKejK
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 17, 2014
It's a Twitter! It's plain! No, it's under funnied, #RhymeCrime! Over 600+ poetic disturbances right cheer… http://t.co/eqBGVmGyl6
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 17, 2014
Enjoy a ball tease
Before my sneeze
I ask pass the #peas
& parmesan #cheese
Many hapless beg with pleas
I say now Draw a #Saints fall Breeze
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 17, 2014
Youth does misspend:
Please won't song end
Though singer's a friend
He will tune extend
So on a #beer err bend
Then to #wine that'll distend
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 17, 2014
Even though much is a sham
Never changing who I am
Green egghead of spam
Rock this toasted jam
Avoid any close exam
& don't my #poetry slam
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 16, 2014
Life no more in flux
Rowed up my ducks
Raking in the bucks
Hauling it in trucks
But I've a #beer & #wine crux
Shall I drink in jeans or tux?
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 16, 2014
KNOW MORE BEER!
Shed a tear for a left-to-fend-for-itself near full bottle of #beer?
I must be clear:
It brings no cheer to this guy here!
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 15, 2014
The progress slow, some excitement must flow, yet my promotion seems to blow, then I plead for your #LIKE to show! https://t.co/P3dp8t2fzZ
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 15, 2014
Rolling up sleeves
Bringing in sheaves
Better gives than thieves
Yet powerful more receives
Means many who grieves
Foresee new #Betsy weaves
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 15, 2014
No time to say grace
Less to shave face
Must master this place
Be glass filler ace
#Wine vintner in deep space
#Beer crafter of hops in case
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 15, 2014
Take a hike
Ride a bike
Roll a strike
Slam a spike
What did everyone think of Mike?
Of course all of them said LIKE: https://t.co/P3dp8t2fzZ
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 14, 2014
Now see what dread
Goldilocks saw bare in bed
Grandma's eyes misled
Hood sees wolf bled
Rosé #wine's best if beef fed
#Beer's served instead
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 14, 2014
RT^@BrianKlymDDS Good evening! Get comfortably prepared for your visit. pic.twitter.com/Qwt10utgeu Meet our team http://t.co/7Y7k2yvAMm #dentist
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 15, 2014
Don't understand #RhymeCrime! at this point? Then there's no hope. Yet, beyond hope we find despair, so let's see it: http://t.co/eqBGVmGyl6
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 13, 2014
This bird speaks
To some pip squeaks
The politician freaks
Raise dander to piques
Ignoble underhanded sneaks
In #FarmersMarkets taking leeks
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 13, 2014
Dues I've paid
Like the Irish Sinéad
While many I played
My act's no charade
Crafting #beer in chaps of suede
Slamming a #wine sonnet tirade
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 13, 2014
If you have not been privy to a #RhymeCrime! - here's your chance for a citizen's arrested development… http://t.co/sX6aHDgu1H
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 12, 2014
Vote if do poll "tax" chore
Supposedly days of lore
#Racism gone they implore
But check card @ door
Need ID to do more…
Freedoms won in war?
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 12, 2014
Rising above my din
Shading gluttonous sin
I try to bad habit pin
But barely hide a grin
So slyly #beer bottle spin
As #wine drips from chin
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 12, 2014
Took this pic 1/2 way into my run/hike in Lake Maria State Park. It's Lake Maria, one of various other smaller lakes. http://t.co/4lThMgwQx1
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 12, 2014
Write a new flick
Not so brain thick
Avoid editor Red-Pencil Nick
Talk sophistry w/a wig schtick
No Tatars had a #fish stick
The end by Mick
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 11, 2014
What does REAL #Marketing offer virtual can't? Well it’s…#Postcards that create a tactile touchdown! @CopiesAndPrint pic.twitter.com/CGanY9h2MT
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 22, 2014
To save you from bland
I type with each hand
Never been outmanned
& I'm so orange tanned
Drink #beers to my stand
To sip #Wine is also grand
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 11, 2014
I've really done it now! I'm an #instagrammy… Follow RTC! http://t.co/tNQJFljfK2
But where is he going?! Is it safe?
OMG what's that!?!
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 10, 2014
That roll none takes
Rants by corny flakes
Forks raise the #steaks
Oil gives US the sheiks
New Disney Frozen rakes
No…it's really the brakes
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 10, 2014
Much is ordinary
Not you mon chéri
Okay now I'm wary
So on the contrary
My #beer choices are surely merry
#Wine is also since from the berry
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 10, 2014
We're doing bad things
Failing to fix o-rings
#Breading our wings
Wading for jellyfish stings
Excusing car door dings
#TMI as a snitch sings
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 9, 2014
Listen to games of tones
Hear their silence cones
Ears of corn on phones
Twisted Cyclops clones
#Beer drunk idea groans
#Wine drank unknowns
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 9, 2014
Rib the wild sides
Rum rhyme my tides
Racked up lamb slides
Favored buffalo wing hides
Writing food cryptic guides
Arrest rant #chef derides
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 8, 2014
There are likes, their our likes & they're our likes… Only one of those is write, rite or right… But like RTC5: https://t.co/P3dp8t2fzZ
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 8, 2014
The tapestry tore
As in ancient lore
Ushering in a mild bore
His yapping others wore
Yet a #beer drinker to his core
& for me did #wine pour
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 8, 2014
The Liking has begun. Yet there could be more: RTC on facebook https://t.co/gdUt00fdM2 @WineAndGarden is a member community
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 7, 2014
A lot said is #bogus
So much it could crocus
Must change our focus
Swarm around a locus
To alter those who oppose us
End the 44 #magnum onus
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 7, 2014
Many call me a quack
Give me much flack
Yet I'm not often off track
It's a knowing knack
#Wine's an aphrodisiac
Much #beer causes me to yack
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 7, 2014
I never run with the pack
Often I hang way back
Then stop for a snack
No my leg's not in a sack
All #hills I do attack
Yet won only a plaque
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 6, 2014
I smell something new
Maybe a past due
Bob's Irish stew
Is it this shoe
Back to craft #beer tasting queue
As wife has #wine & returns to pew
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 6, 2014
Looking left off our front porch is this cattail lake, & large oaks on the ridge in the background. Be… http://t.co/pxla7MklFA
#instagram
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 5, 2014
Eyes kept peeled
With safe sun shield
I surveyed a scorn field
Until "facts" were sealed
Their "#truth" being revealed
My mouth…OMG appealed
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 5, 2014
Doing some running through the park… http://t.co/jkmgVbXdZ8 video by RTC #instagram
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 5, 2014
Spanning the glob
Being the big knob
Ingratiate the snob
Denigrate the slob
A #MN craft #beer booth bums rob
Making many #wine kind also sob
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 5, 2014
RTC's thinking about hitting the trails, doing the run/hike thing. Sun may just dry things up some… http://t.co/3dccmr8YmK #video
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 4, 2014
Here it is… Very Dreary: The Video … http://t.co/lAWSYqMPdw
by RTC
#instagram #videos
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 4, 2014
Rocking to droll
Dancing the pole
You call it govt dole
Want #taxes taken@ toll
So now all cash in a hole
After removing #globalwarming coal
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 4, 2014
Nothing need you want
What some may taunt
I think flaky croissant…
To have ideas like Kant
Craft #beers of Vermont
To be a #winemaker savant
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 4, 2014
It's bunch of #RhymeCrime! for Lunch… http://t.co/eqBGVmGyl6 Over 500 #micropottery or #brokenpoems…
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 3, 2014
Check out RTC 5 Communities: LIKE, if I do say so myself… https://t.co/P3dp8t2fzZ #fb
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 3, 2014
Let there be peace
#Hate…time to cease
Cruelty must decrease
Defend & serve US police
Purge politics palm grease
Corporations end the fleece
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 3, 2014
Good morning with a photo from the other night… http://t.co/HGhZVdZeUw
#parks #sunsets #hills #trails
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 3, 2014
Sunshine I can't forsake
Summer's hard to shake
Craft #beer at the lake
Good #wine to worry forsake
What am I to make
Of my former big stake
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 3, 2014
This is my alien invasion pic. The laser (sun streak) and the hovering ships (clouds) hitting the rebel positions... pic.twitter.com/wuz4VOUvsl
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 3, 2014
Test out RTC 5 Communities. Then LIKE it. A simple test. You can even use your textbooks, take as a group… https://t.co/P3dp8t2fzZ #fb
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 2, 2014
Meet me online, we can visualize together: http://t.co/tNQJFljfK2
#instagram - we may not agree, but a few drinks is a start
#wine #beer
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 2, 2014
Another sunset pic. This was on the back side of Anderson Hill. http://t.co/q50nDwfad7
#hiking #MN Lake Maria State Park
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 2, 2014
End of the line
That'll be fine
I've seen many a sign
Saying where to dine
I'm sure each one is divine
Yet I don't see a list of local #wine
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 2, 2014
Advance a craft tier
Enter our taste sphere
Uplift some cheer
Shift tap into gear
Pour everyone a #beer
Then make #wine appear
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 2, 2014
Racism small drop
Blacks still fear cop stop
Trust been in chop shop
As white…do I prop
In 60s had shaggy mop top
Must undo #rebel heir crop
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 1, 2014
What does REAL #Marketing offer virtual can't? Well it’s…#Postcards that create a tactile touchdown! @CopiesAndPrint pic.twitter.com/CGanY9h2MT
— Wines And Gardens (@WineAndGarden) September 22, 2014
